Interestingly enough he also wanted me to check out other places. Being unemployed and emotionally unstable I don't know if it was worth it so I tried it out. I'm trying to do something different I suppose because what I've been doing lately for myself or what I have not been doing isn't working all too well. The definition of "insanity..."
He asked me pretty much everything from what my family members do to pretty much anything he wanted while I didn't know much about him. I guess the focus was so on me that I didn't realize the conversation was somewhat one sided.
This was probably not the first time I cried and had to stop talking to get me to be able to speak. Perhaps all the times that I've ever talked to a counselor I had a breakdown... This time I broke down when I was telling him about my day to day routine as of. I cried because I know that I am wasting time and in a shit hole and I am not doing anything to achieve or give back to my family in return. I said I was "trapped" and hopeless :'(
Maybe he is asking me all these rando questions because he wants to figure out how much he can charge me? It's $50 cash per session. Today's session probably went like 30 mins over so it was like an hour and 30 mins.
His Solutions
Assignment 1 - resolve date for training with point of contact.
Assignment 2 - come up with a 6 month goal.
Showed me the deep breathing exercise which I learned yesterday on Youtube to help me anytime I feel anxiety. I figured anytime that I overthink/indecisive I become more and more anxious.
Towards the end I was in a dilemma because I couldn't make up my mind if I should see him again or not. He's already got me all invested in this first session and he asks me this? I feel like I am such a pushover/passive beta because I am incompetent and not confident in making any resolutions. I'm seeking approval by letting others make decisions for me and when they do make decisions for me and things do not go as plan I begin to blame others.
I think he was surprised how much crap I checked: financial worry, depression, anxiety, indecision, unmotivated, etc. Man! what a downward spiral!
He is a proud introvert. He suggest I not give a fuck about other people or society and only focus on me. I should do what makes me happy. He also likes how I am an introvert because I am similar to him. I like to think a lot and I like to keep a journal everywhere I go. He also suggest that I write down my thoughts.
As for career even he suggested before I make a big career decision that I should work in the setting first before making the move. From his experience he was a case manager at a hospital before pursuing his Masters.
He is a proud introvert. He suggest I not give a fuck about other people or society and only focus on me. I should do what makes me happy. He also likes how I am an introvert because I am similar to him. I like to think a lot and I like to keep a journal everywhere I go. He also suggest that I write down my thoughts.
As for career even he suggested before I make a big career decision that I should work in the setting first before making the move. From his experience he was a case manager at a hospital before pursuing his Masters.
I asked my friend if he had ever been to a counselor before and he had. The counselor he had was an intern. His visit was far but it was free. Lol how everything he searches for online is free since he didn't have money. Still wise of him to get the services he needed and wanted.
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